Talking about sexuality in terms of awareness means finally making it an integral part of our individual and social life: it implies putting it at the centre of the human being, in terms of quality and not quantity, for a prosperous well-being of body, mind and spirit.
It means giving importance and meaning to desires, fantasies, individual needs and considering that sexuality does not only involve the body but also our emotions, our soul, our past and all the sensations that are part of every sexual encounter, even purely occasional ones.
This becomes especially relevant given our society’s obsession with sex; one might think that it is already too much, but beware: as Freud says, we obsessively show what we do not fully possess or do not have at our disposal.
It is a fascinating subject, rich in nuances but above all exquisitely, wonderfully, extraordinarily human. Let me take you by the hand and follow me under the surface, there is a whole world waiting for us.
Why is sexuality important?
Sexuality is more important than we think: it reverberates in every aspect of our daily life as an integral part of who we are. Sexuality represents life. Because what we seek in sexuality is not only bodily satisfaction but also being seen, desired and connected to our deepest desires. When you feel sexually satisfied it is very likely that you perceive your whole life as satisfying; vice versa, when you are not, everything else could also suffer from this dissatisfaction.
Being able to fully access sexual energy (which is first of all vital energy) in a healthy way radiates us from the depths of well-being; it is no coincidence that people who have flourishing sexuality (and by this, I don’t mean that they do a lot of sexual activity) are joyful, creative, sociable, full of life subjects.
Sexuality is not only about what we do in the bedroom, but also about the relationship we have with our genitals, how we feel about our body, whether or not we feel at ease with a person, how we relate to others, how we cook, how we talk; even how we think about the planet.
The context in which we live
Yet the context in which we are immersed leads us to have a completely distorted idea of the sphere of intimacy: we pay the price for a serious lack of education in sexuality and affectivity (even if luckily things are slowly changing) and we navigate in the dark, without tools, without serenity, without knowing what it means to have a flourishing sexuality, lost between moralism on one side and pressing sexual consumerism on the other.
We are at the mercy of clichés, false myths or even highly toxic concepts deriving from the patriarchal culture with which our society is unfortunately still peppered.
There is an exaggerated focus on doing rather than feeling.
We feel inadequate, as we think we have to conform to certain standards when in reality the concept of normality exists in no aspect of our life: there are simply more or less common, more or less widespread things. Everyone should be free to experience their sexuality in the way they perceive it to be most nourishing and most beautiful and always in a context based on mutual consent.
The opportunity for a growth journey
We are different and we are complex: sexuality is complex. The tendency of today’s society is to look for easy and possibly even quick solutions. We can try to avoid complexity and try to live a sexuality without feelings, personalities and repercussions. But most likely any attempt to deny its meaningful layers will likely come back to haunt us. It’s important to realise how vast the world of sexuality is and our potential ability to feel infinite nuances; it is essential to allow ourselves to be who we are, without compromises and 100% faithful to what we feel within us.
Sexuality can be the opportunity, the trigger, the push for a path of personal and spiritual growth: understanding how to thrive sexually is above all a path within ourselves, to discover ourselves, what we really desire, without masks or veils. Without resistances, without defensive schemes learned and the barriers that we raise and that limit our pleasure rather than expand it.
My support as a psycho-somatic sex educator
Along this path, psycho-somatic sex education helps people expand their ability to live life in the deepest and most conscious way possible and to enjoy conscious sexuality by working on the body, mind and spirit.
Physically, I support people in learning how to get deeply in touch with their body, I teach new ways of touching, negotiating desires, discovering genital anatomy and many other things about sexuality that teach people how to feel more alive.
On a mental level, it is possible to develop more awareness and presence during sexual exchanges, experimenting with the conscious placement of attention and learning to recognize incorrect habits and patterns.
On a spiritual level, I support recognizing, welcoming and exploring our most authentic desires without any judgement (because everything that is judged grows bigger fed by repressed energies, while everything that is explored and lived with awareness leads to integration and knowledge) and to honouring ourselves first through conscious consent.
Living a conscious, flourishing, fulfilling sexuality is possible. There are no limits on age, sexual identity or orientation, or even physical conditions. Contact me if you feel like you would like to work on these issues or subscribe to my newsletter to stay updated on other projects and the initiatives I promote.
May you make your life’s energy flourish in all its glory!
